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I have a beautiful wife, an infant son & a schnauzer. viva la tex-mex. Words that describe or excite: Missional, Glocal, Lead, Innovate, Initiate, Create, Risk, Community

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Top 5/Bottom 5 Candies

I have decided to create a new installment to my blog and am open for suggestions but wanted to start with this one on candy. Everyone had their favorite candies as a kid and even now, but what about the candies that were a complete and utter whip. You know there were the greatest and then their were the ones that were just a beat down. This does not contain candy bars that will be separate and specific Top 5/Bottom 5 for the future.

Bottom 5
Necco Wafers: These seem to be the first candy ever invented (though I have not done conclusive research) because they appear to have been invented before anyone thought of the idea that candy should taste good.

2. Wax Lips/Wax Bottles:
Isn't this really a form of punishment, make a kid suffer the horrible taste of wax for a slight sensation of momentary liquid flavoring. The reward is definitely not worth the effort.

3. Fun Dip:
Why by this messy, boring candy when you can just eat a sugar packet or pour sugar into your mouth straight from the dispenser if that is what you are craving??? (or only slightly better Pixie Stix)
4. Black Licorice: This actually may be one of the first forms of candy but come on, it tastes like medicine!
5. Rainbow Coconut Bar/3 Color Coconut Bar: Just plain gross, a mean sadistic trick to make kids think coconut is candy.Honorable Mentions:
Candy Buttons (also by Necco) just plain lame and sometimes called Dots on Paper (seriously?!), Now & Laters (I know I will catch some flack for this but they are the evil twin of their much better counterpart Starburst--only N&L's make your teeth stick together so you can not get your mouth back open)
Sugar Daddys (or the lesser none, Slo Poke, these are again an example of a candy that requires too much effort and not enough reward, unless you like having to pry your jaws apart with a crow bar. And their counterpart, aptly named Sugar Babies, are the same great flavor without the extended period of lockjaw.)
Candy Corn: Seriously???
Hard Stick Gum that came in novelty cards packs. Just plain gross.

Danger Alert
: Deadly or at least Injurious Candy worth mentioning--AstroPop
The original Astropop was a cone shaped hard candy sucker that was Red, Green and Yellow and the pointy end faced up and the candy widened at the bottom towards the end of the stick. As you licked the original AstroPop the point became a razor sharp, needle point dagger of death that you could use to stab your little sister or poke your own eye out. Unfortunately they have corrected this and I was unable to find a picture of the original version of this candy, but imagine the above picture (top of blog) inverted to where the pointy end is up.

Top 5
Honorable Mentions:

Bit O'Honey: They may be too sticky for some but they are a great one of a kind flavor, that I enjoy.
Lemonheads: When you want something sour there is only one choice.
Nerds and Smarties: Small, tangy, sugary sweet, packaged in small amounts so you don't wig out on an over the top sugar rush.

5. Rolos: Easy. Caramel, chocolate, bite size. Greatness

4. Pop Rocks: If these don't make you smile and scream fun then you must be a Nazi or a Catholic School Headmistress.

3. Goo Goo Clusters Supreme:
This is strictly a Southern treat. Milk Chocolate, Pecans, Caramel and Marshmellow. Of if you prefer, Original, which replaces Pecans with Peanuts.2. Starburst: If it is not evident by my previous choices I am a chocolate lover but when it comes to fruity goodness Starburst can't be beat. They are softer and easy to chew than most fruit candies and they pack a powerfully strong flavor in each bite size candy.
1. Peanut M&M's: Chocolate covered peanuts in a hard candy shell. Pure Genius. And truth in advertising: They do not melt in your hands, but the ad says nothing about the color sweating. But for those who want to complain all I have to say is "They come in a bag!" Eat 'em as you go.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

my comments on the whole post:
-Necco Wafers are classic. but, too chalky
-Wax Lips are at least fun to play with
-Fun Dip was like crack at Mills Elementary
-Black Licorice sucks. period. i hated all licorice until twizzlers, specifically pull and peel.
-Rainbow Coconut Bars are in my favor. i can't down a whole one in a sitting, though
-What crazy old man though up Candy Buttons? "oooh. i made a machine that puts drops of glazed sugar on paper. BEST SELLER!"
-They're called "now and laters" for a reason. you must be patient, padawan. plus, i DEFINITELY prefer the flavor over starburst.
-Candy corn is addicting. seriously.
-Lemonheads are aaaahhhmazing
-Rolos. nuff said.
-Pop Rocks are more fun than beating up your brother.
-Goo Goo Clusters Supreme are the only way to go. i can get peanuts and caramel in a snickers bar.

there's my take on it.